A day with the Dalai Lama.
What would you talk to the Dalai Lama about?
So the big day had come - we had already brainstormed on a wide range of themes from our social and business perspectives and had decided on a list of questions and stories that we could share with the Dalai Lama. I really wanted to have his Holiness's ear to tell him all about Fair Trade and how it is living proof of a widening bridge between the social and business sectors and widely supported by the public. But it was going to be difficult. As I've said, in Canada Fair Trade is not very well known (although fellow social entrepreneur Pierre Legault is soon to change that with a new Fair Trade shop format idea and he has just received his first order from People Tree from the UK!).
The problem was that I kept getting myself locked in the loo. It happened twice! Was it nerves that prevented me from opening the lock or was it a message from somewhere? Shouldn't I be there? Should I just go back to my hotel room? We were the first group scheduled to open discussions with him, fortunately being small I was able to crawl out under the toilet door. Not a very respectable challenge to undertake in your favorite Fair Trade silk dress and heels!! It was difficult trying to look dignified, especially with someone in the loo next door!
We rose from our seats, white scarves around our necks as the Dalai Lama entered the room, and made his way to his chair. After a few formalities the questions started. Fourteen of us and the Dalai Lama were seated around a large round table.
A Positive Mind
The social leaders amongst us shared with him the stories of the struggle people in our communities face and asked what we should do when overwhelmed by the size of the problem. The Dalai Lama thought for a while and looking very serious said: " I have admiration for your work, your successful stories of engaging and overcoming. People appreciate, give you more encouragement, self confidence and determination and more able to help more people." I recall him saying that even if you save one person's life or lessen their struggle, we should feel it is worthwhile. Later in the dialogue, hearing a similar story he said that we have to start some non-violent revolutionary work. The oppressed must have self confidence. The West provides equipment, money but real progress has to be made by the people, not the outside dictating what kind of development there should be.
Connecting for Change
Asked what advice he could give to help the informal (social) and formal (business) worlds engage, the Dalai Lama reiterated that:
"We should not feel discouraged, work continually, the key is education and training on both sides. Utilise every opportunity. The formal sector should learn the realities of the informal sector."
On business he said: "The business world is a very important part of society - without money you can't do much." He went on to say that business should give some of its profits to the community and towards charity work.
Here was my chance I raised my hand: "I'm confused. We are beginning to hear business also talking about the triple bottom line, not only financial, but social and environmental. The Fair Trade movement does this, working with marginalised communities with natural and organic fabrics, but our products have to compete in an uneven playing field with products that don't cover these costs. Even big companies are asking for regulation as it costs more to meet higher ethical standards. They cannot compete with companies making products to lower standards. Do you feel we should be pushing for more regulation or work towards more consumer awareness so that they learn to seek out and support these new initiatives?"
Phew... that was a long question.
He smiled at me and answered thoughtfully "I think more consumer education and maybe ... some regulation too." He came back to the idea in discussions later. He either liked my smile, or thought me mad.
To a question put forward on peace, the Dalai Lama responded that it's very dangerous to suggest that Islam and Christianity are at odds with each other. “This is totally wrong. Just a few mischievous people cannot represent all. I am a Buddhist monk but I am protecting Islam.” He concluded with the importance of not pushing Muslims into isolation.
When asked about the environment, he became very grave indeed. He said that scientists have now proved the causes behind global warming and that man is a major cause to climate change. “When I came to India I had no idea of ecology. People would say you can drink from this spring, this one you cannot. In Tibet you can drink all the water" He went on to describe the delicate situation of the ecology of Tibet, and how important it is that the Chinese new guests be educated to care about the environment of Tibet. Later he became very passionate and raised his voice: "We think we can control nature, that is a false perception."
Asked how he deals with conflict and tension he said: "I am always realistic. I won't say something high lama, or sometimes formality becomes a barrier. I have been a monk since I was a 4 year old boy. I didn't volunteer!” He laughed. “I trained and realised the value of this as an adult. No conflict. I don't care about status. I talk to people like I am a monk. I prefer informality, but the elder ones think differently. On one occasion in Argentina a Japanese Zen Buddhist was holding a rosary very formally and the string broke and the beads scattered (The Dalai Lama makes a gesture showing how they covered the floor) and he remained pretending to thumb the beads. If it were me I would have...” and he bends on his chair and mimics picking them up.
The continued struggle for equality
“I think that during Buddha's time 2,500 years ago there were many social ills due to caste discrimination, so Buddha said "All people are the same. Unequal is wrong”.
The Dalai Lama recalls meeting Chairman Mao, who told him that Buddha is a Revolutionary and an ancient feminist. I remember brightening up when I heard this, and he told the story of a sick monk who was lying there neglected, and Buddha told a brother to bring water to wash him - like Jesus Christ. “The master demonstrated that people are equal.” The Dalai Lama is beaming.
There was much, much more shared by the Dalai Lama but I cannot do it justice.
The day was nearly over, hugs all round to many wonderful people who had shared the journey. No one in the room disagreed with the Dalai Lama that together we need to build a new education system to promote the universal values of empathy, compassion, warm heartedness to build a sense of responsibility and community. An education of the heart was needed and it was simply up to all of us to get on and start it right away at home with our children showing them genuine affection extending through family, friends, colleagues. The next thing you know you could have cleaned up the way your company does business or at least taken some big steps in that direction. The message was loud and clear - it was down to us!
On the journey to Japan I read 'The Wisdom of Forgiveness - Intimate Conversations and Journeys' by His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Victor Chan. A great and fun read but I am very tearful. Was it early PMT or had His Holiness really got to me and had a profound effect on me?
Preparing to meet his Holiness the Dalai Lama and finding out about his new centre
Despite it being 4am on my body clock I join the other participants for welcome drinks, having just flown into Vancouver. Peter Koestenbaum, a famous philosopher who quit the academic world 20 years ago to bring the benefit of his knowledge to the business community takes me under his wing because, he says, he likes my smile. Sure I am the only European here, at any event like this at home, I'd have a few friends. There are social leaders such as Yewoinshet Masresha from Hope for Children, working with children with AIDS in Ethiopia to Michael Karp of AWISH (A World Institute for Sustainable Humanity) from the USA and the First Nations, the indigenous people of Canada are also there to advocate for their land rights, respect and support for their communities.
In these areas children of the indigenous population were forcibly taken away from their families and put into residential schools fifty years ago. This only stopped twenty years ago. This practice resulted in a huge undermining of their communities, traditions and language. Today these groups are extremely marginalised and suffer huge drug addiction and alcoholism.
The next conference day started with the (eerie) song of the First Nation People. Looking over the mountain and waterways of Vancouver, could there be a better place to build the Dalai Lama Center for Peace and Education?
All the social and business leaders break up into small groups to brainstorm on the following: What role should the Center serve? How should it connect both sectors?
As a social leader who works with the business community through Fair Trade, I have a lot to say. Fair Trade is less well known in Canada and the US, but how can I keep my mouth shut?
Rather than changing the way we do business to cover social and environmental costs, the discussion often seems to conclude that giving a portion of profits to charity is enough. Of course this is a start but not enough to reduce poverty and I am convinced that this is not the solution for sustainability.
What shall we ask him?
This session, I find a bit amusing. I have so many practical things I want to ask him. I am literally bursting to get some practical tips on being more effective at what I do - and yet we seem to be getting bogged down in rather abstract, philosophical questions. Most of us are untrained in philosophy and not of an exceptional spiritual level. I feel that engagements of this kind maybe rather lost on me anyway. We decide to try and stay with practical issues that need to be addressed.
Some of us work on the questions after the Dalai Lama's speech to 18,000 Canadians at the local baseball stadium. It will be great to be close up tomorrow, there's nothing like my making eye contact when talking closely with someone.
The stadium is full and Tibetan music is performed by children on stage. There is a false start the Dalai Lama and his entourage are a little late. One of our group starts singing the Canadian National anthem to fill the awkward silence and the whole stadium joins in. Shortly, round shouldered and dressed in orange and red surrounded by friends, the Dalai Lama comes onto the stage, beaming, hands together, comically walking from one end of the stage to the other one hand over his brow to shield his eyes from the glare to see the audience. He is made honorary citizen of Canada, much to everyone's delight, and then asks about his rights and says if the obligations are too much he won't stick around. His face and demeanor change as he starts to talk about happiness, focusing on compassion and our interconnectedness, discussing how our effort in these two areas will make for greater happiness. After expanding on each he says: "I don't know, I don't know. Is that helpful?" Sometimes he breaks off in a giggling fit and we all join in like giggling teenagers.
Mmm... No life changing messages yet, but what a genuine warmth and what a gorgeous person he is!
How will we be able to engage him tomorrow close up I wonder? Will we manage to ditch some of the formality that is a barrier to frank exchange? Perhaps it is disrespectful but I feel an odd sense of familiarity, he is like my Japanese Tea Teacher's husband - wise, polite but fun to be with and able to laugh at himself. Am I mad? He is the Dalai Lama.
The Dalai Lama brings together business and social leaders.
"Have you not received the invitation, we've sent it three times?"
Finally I noticed the email from the organisers of the "Connecting for Change Conference" in Vancouver. I've been traveling and setting up in London and without a PA, some things had slipped through.
I'm not very good at conferences, and to go that far for one seemed mad - but like many others I was curious. Could the Dalai Lama provide a bridge between people like me, striving for social justice, and business leaders? And could I gain any useful insights? Cynically I feared I wouldn't be at all "convinced" by his thoughts on reconciliation - being a doer myself I didn't want to hear a load of abstract stuff.
I went because I was curious and decided to prepare some questions to ask him. (My kids let me go even though it was their first week after starting a new school, because their grandmother told them who the Dalai Lama is ... and I think in retrospect because she'd met Archbishop Desmond Tutu in a smallish group and found him really inspiring. Thanks Family!!)
You have these times in your life when you feel like nothing is happening by chance. When I sense this I try not to make too much of it, not to jinx it as it were.
I have to tell you here that I am not religious, although I believe in something greater than us. My mother is a Christian and my father was a Muslim (he died of cancer when I was very young). They decided not to instruct me in either. I did join the girls brigade for a year or two at the local church, which raised some scorn from my sister - an avid TV watcher and agnostic. I remember thinking that perhaps a faith or some kind of spirituality was better than worshiping the god of materialism. My dad had forbade us to watch commercial television, but my mum gave up the ban when we turned into uncontrollable teenagers.
So anyway, I am gliding through the airplane aisles with no liquids, gels, tiny hand carry luggage - all very streamlined - and take my seat next to a handsome elderly Italian man, robed to the floor in white and with a white turban and white shoes. He sports rather bling gold worry beads and a snowy beard. I feel a bit awkward. So I strike up a conversation with his companion, a friendly woman, who tells me: "He is a living Saint". There is some small talk and I go off to the loo.
When I come back and I bend to sit down, he touches the crown of my head softly to bless me and I tell him about what I do. Great! I think as I pluck up the courage to ask him some of the questions I have rehearsed for the Dalai Lama. I start asking but from his answers I see that I am a lost child. He suggests the way for peace is to keep the faith you were brought up in, no mixed marriages, etc. Too late in my case. I ask a few more questions, he is getting a little agitated and says that when I meet spiritual leaders I shouldn't ask questions, only ask for their blessing. I shut up and during the following long hours of flying he pets my head a dozen times. I am beginning to feel like a puppy!
Clearly I am ill prepared to meet the Dalai Lama. I have got it all wrong. I don't understand. I step down in Vancouver feeling rather lonely.
More coming...
We are looking for an excellent and experienced PA to be based at the People Tree office. Look out for details on the website soon.
